Shane Parrish on Finding Clarity and Making Better Decisions (Pt 1) | The Daily Stoic

Intro

In this episode of “The Daily Stoic” podcast, host Ryan talks to Shane Parrish, the founder of the Farnam Street blog, about finding clarity and making better decisions. Shane is a highly recommended author, thinker, and business person, known for his newsletter and podcast. They discuss Shane’s new book, “Clear Thinking: Turning Ordinary Moments into Extraordinary Results,” and delve into various topics related to decision-making and the writing process.

Main Takeaways

Shane Parrish’s Writing Journey

• Shane Parrish has evolved as a father, thinker, reader, and business person, and his newsletter and podcast are highly recommended by the host.
• Shane’s new book, “Clear Thinking: Turning Ordinary Moments into Extraordinary Results,” has debuted on the bestseller list and is highly praised.
• Shane has also authored a series of books called “The Great Mental Models,” which are popular and well-received.

The Writing Process

• The author received multiple offers for their book after a New York Times profile, despite not having an agent.
• The author wrote the book three times, ignoring advice to structure the book before writing.
• Morgan Housel advised spending 80% of editing time on the first 50-60 pages of a book to capture reader attention.
• The beginning of a book or email is crucial to capturing the audience’s attention.
• The concept of “Well Begun is Half Done” applies not only to editing but also to other areas, such as conferences and video content.
• In today’s fast-paced world, capturing attention within the first few seconds is essential, as seen in platforms like TikTok and YouTube.
• Start with a strong opening to grab the audience’s attention, whether it’s a YouTube video or the first sentence of a paragraph.
• Writing in stories can be more engaging than exposition, as stories naturally take the audience from one point to another.
• When writing, focus on what’s essential and refine the content, rather than padding it out. Cutting unnecessary content can make the message clearer and more impactful.

The Writing Process and Decision-Making

• The speaker initially planned to release four books in four years, but later decided to explore other book ideas with the publisher.
• The decision to take a break and create space for writing ultimately improved the final product.
• The author cut 10,000 words from the manuscript and then added 7,500 words back in, resulting in a better final product.
• Allowing the writing process to spread out over 18 months was easier and produced a stronger outcome.
• The author’s approach to future projects involves being more conscious of the book’s structure and necessary resources before diving into the writing process.
• The process of writing a book was different from writing short articles.
• The author didn’t plan out the book in detail, which made the process challenging.
• Writing short articles without a detailed plan was the author’s usual approach.
• The author struggled with transitioning from manageable projects to a larger, more complex one.
• The fear of changing an existing process and the aversion to a new system were obstacles.
• The need for a different approach for a bigger project, similar to building a cathedral instead of a shed, was highlighted.

Clarity and Decision-Making

• Voluntary hardships can sometimes make things more difficult than they need to be, such as self-publishing versus traditional publishing.
• It’s important to have clarity about why you’re doing something, so you can resist advice that may lead you away from your goals.
• There’s value in doing the hard thing, as it leads to deep learning and personal growth.
• Understanding your motives and goals helps you discern which advice to listen to and which to ignore.
• Diving into a project helps you truly understand it and its impact on your life.
• Knowing why you’re doing something can help you make decisions that align with your purpose, even if it means taking the harder path.
• Traditional publishers couldn’t guarantee high quality production at a reasonable cost.
• The speaker’s priority was to break even and offer high-quality products to customers.
• Challenges with printing, shipping, and storing their own books.
• Self-publishing may not always be more profitable than traditional publishing when considering risk and other factors.
• Making individual decisions without clarity can lead to short-term wins but long-term losses.
• Small choices can accumulate and have significant long-term consequences.
• We often overlook the true cost of things, focusing only on the price tag and not considering the post-tax earnings and additional costs such as maintenance, opportunity costs, and financing.
• Hidden fees and costs are often obscured from view, leading us to believe that we are getting the better end of the deal when in reality, we may be overlooking the true costs.
• Considering the broader impact of our decisions, such as the potential strain on relationships or the stress on our mental and emotional well-being, can lead to better decision-making.
• The true cost of things isn’t always quantifiable and can include stress on relationships, time commitment, and opportunity costs.
• People often make decisions that lead to unintended consequences, such as sacrificing health for a marginal increase in income or status.
• Wisdom lies in considering the downstream consequences of our decisions across all aspects of our lives, akin to creating a mosaic where each choice impacts different areas of our lives.
• Life is like a mosaic, with different parts such as work, health, relationships, and community, all needing to integrate to create a balanced life.
• The analogy of a mosaic is used to illustrate the importance of having a clear vision for your life and evaluating decisions based on how they fit into the larger picture.
• It’s essential to not just pursue what you want, but to also understand what’s worth wanting in the first place, to avoid reaching a point in life where you realize you’ve been pursuing the wrong goals.
• Pursuing a goal is important, but the way we accomplish it matters.

Purity vs. Pragmatism in Decision-Making

• A CEO’s approach led to transactional relationships and a lack of meaningful connections.
• The cost of achieving a goal in a certain way can be more expensive in retrospect.
• Justifying actions and stepping on others to get ahead can damage relationships permanently.
• Win-win relationships are the only ones that survive over time.
• Negatively impacting someone can lead to them seeking an alternative, building up resentment over time.
• The paradox of life: wanting to be admired and respected but thinking success requires the opposite behavior.
• Virtue is not just a possession, but a practice; doing the opposite of what we aspire to be makes it hard to become that person.
• Character is defined by what you do, not what you are.
• People rationalize their actions and slowly change as they progress in their careers.
• Society is surprised by the outcomes of individuals who have worked within a system for a long time.
• Working within a system or society remakes individuals in its image.
• Changing character is not as simple as wanting to be a good person; it requires navigating difficult situations and teaching others.
• It’s easier to see in others that their character won’t change, but it would be sad to realize the same about ourselves.
• It’s important to accept others for who they are, while also not giving up on your ability to change.
• The decisions you make in your 20s may not align with your values and virtues later in life.
• James Clear emphasizes the need for a conscious identity shift to make decisions that reinforce that identity.
• Building the muscle of making individual decisions is crucial for being able to make hard right decisions in the future.
• Many leaders struggle to make difficult decisions because they haven’t built the strength to do so over time.
• People may not be able to handle the pain of taking a stand, which could result in backlash or losing their job.
• There is a need for emotional strength to withstand the consequences of taking a stand on important issues.
• Small cowardly decisions can lead to the inability to prioritize doing the right thing over keeping a job.
• Having physical courage doesn’t always translate to having moral courage, and values should guide decision-making.
• Politicians may get caught up in the news cycle and make decisions based on avoiding giving the other side what they want.
• Idealists and purists may struggle to accomplish anything, so pragmatism is essential in politics.
• Jimmy Carter’s pragmatic approach to politics, such as addressing racial discrimination in his inauguration speech, led to his success.
• President Jimmy Carter’s decision to offer a blanket pardon for anyone who evaded serving in Vietnam on his first day in office is seen as a key factor that may have hindered his chances for a second term.
• Carter’s approach to governance was characterized by a sense of purity and moral conviction, which may have limited his ability to compromise and collaborate effectively.
• The discussion explores the distinction between pragmatism, moral purity, and the concept of the ends justifying the means in politics.
• The Stoics were inherently political, with figures like Seneca and Cato holding public offices and advocating for Stoic involvement in politics.
• The case of Cato, known for his moral purity and conservatism, illustrates the potential pitfalls of inflexibility in politics, as seen in his inability to compromise with Caesar.
• Cato’s unwavering commitment to his principles inadvertently drove potential allies into the arms of his opponents, highlighting the complexities of balancing purity and pragmatism in politics.
• Cicero and Seneca discuss the pragmatic approach to living in reality and making the most of a situation.
• Seneca’s decision to tutor Nero, a promising but increasingly tyrannical leader, raises questions about complicity and the justification of means.
• The concept of gradual involvement and investment leading to ethical compromise is explored.
• The temptation to maintain one’s position and influence, and the self-deception of comparing oneself to others, are highlighted.
• The importance of taking a stand and being willing to act despite lack of recognition or understanding from others is emphasized.
• People often make snap judgments based on a specific lens they have, without understanding the nuances of a situation.
• It’s difficult to make someone understand something when their salary or identity depends on them not understanding.
• Triggering someone’s identity can lead to a strong resistance to change, as it threatens how they see themselves and want others to see them.
• It’s challenging to get someone to accept a truth that would make them feel complicit or wrong, as it requires a significant shift in their reality.
• Understanding someone’s point of view and the variables that matter to them can lead to a more effective approach in trying to change their mindset.
• Socrates’s idea that nobody is wrong on purpose highlights the importance of stepping into someone else’s perspective before making judgments.

Other Notable Points

• Invention is a way to address timeless human problems.
• Socratic method involves asking incisive questions to reveal contradictions or faulty assumptions.
• Socrates doesn’t impose his views but provokes understanding in his interlocutor.
• People operate in self-contained universes where their logic makes sense.
• Encourages listeners to rate and review the podcast on iTunes.
• Prime members can access “The Daily Stoic” early and ad-free on Amazon Music or with Wonder Plus in Apple Podcasts.

Summary

Shane Parrish’s Writing Journey

Shane Parrish, the founder of the Farnam Street blog, has evolved as a father, thinker, reader, and business person. His newsletter and podcast come highly recommended by the host. Shane’s new book, “Clear Thinking: Turning Ordinary Moments into Extraordinary Results,” has debuted on the bestseller list and is highly praised. He has also authored a series of books called “The Great Mental Models,” which are popular and well-received.

The Writing Process

The author received multiple offers for their book after a New York Times profile, despite not having an agent. They wrote the book three times, ignoring advice to structure the book before writing. Morgan Housel advised spending 80% of editing time on the first 50-60 pages of a book to capture reader attention. The beginning of a book or email is crucial to capturing the audience’s attention. In today’s fast-paced world, capturing attention within the first few seconds is essential, as seen in platforms like TikTok and YouTube. Starting with a strong opening can grab the audience’s attention, whether it’s a YouTube video or the first sentence of a paragraph. Writing in stories can be more engaging than exposition, as stories naturally take the audience from one point to another. When writing, it’s important to focus on what’s essential and refine the content, rather than padding it out. Cutting unnecessary content can make the message clearer and more impactful.

The Writing Process and Decision-Making

The speaker initially planned to release four books in four years but later decided to explore other book ideas with the publisher. Taking a break and creating space for writing ultimately improved the final product. The author cut 10,000 words from the manuscript and then added 7,500 words back in, resulting in a better final product. Allowing the writing process to spread out over 18 months was easier and produced a stronger outcome. The author’s approach to future projects involves being more conscious of the book’s structure and necessary resources before diving into the writing process. The process of writing a book was different from writing short articles. The author didn’t plan out the book in detail, which made the process challenging. Writing short articles without a detailed plan was the author’s usual approach. The author struggled with transitioning from manageable projects to a larger, more complex one. The fear of changing an existing process and the aversion to a new system were obstacles. The need for a different approach for a bigger project, similar to building a cathedral instead of a shed, was highlighted.

Clarity and Decision-Making

Voluntary hardships can sometimes make things more difficult than they need to be, such as self-publishing versus traditional publishing. It’s important to have clarity about why you’re doing something, so you can resist advice that may lead you away from your goals. There’s value in doing the hard thing, as it leads to deep learning and personal growth. Understanding your motives and goals helps you discern which advice to listen to and which to ignore. Diving into a project helps you truly understand it and its impact on your life. Knowing why you’re doing something can help you make decisions that align with your purpose, even if it means taking the harder path. Traditional publishers couldn’t guarantee high-quality production at a reasonable cost. The speaker’s priority was to break even and offer high-quality products to customers. They faced challenges with printing, shipping, and storing their own books. Self-publishing may not always be more profitable than traditional publishing when considering risk and other factors. Making individual decisions without clarity can lead to short-term wins but long-term losses. Small choices can accumulate and have significant long-term consequences. We often overlook the true cost of things, focusing only on the price tag and not considering the post-tax earnings and additional costs such as maintenance, opportunity costs, and financing. Hidden fees and costs are often obscured from view, leading us to believe that we are getting the better end of the deal when, in reality, we may be overlooking the true costs. Considering the broader impact of our decisions, such as the potential strain on relationships or the stress on our mental and emotional well-being, can lead to better decision-making. The true cost of things isn’t always quantifiable and can include stress on relationships, time commitment, and opportunity costs. People often make decisions that lead to unintended consequences, such as sacrificing health for a marginal increase in income or status. Wisdom lies in considering the downstream consequences of our decisions across all aspects of our lives, akin to creating a mosaic where each choice impacts different areas of our lives. Life is like a mosaic, with different parts such as work, health, relationships, and community, all needing to integrate to create a balanced life. The analogy of a mosaic is used to illustrate the importance of having a clear vision for your life and evaluating decisions based on how they fit into the larger picture. It’s essential to not just pursue what you want but to also understand what’s worth wanting in the first place, to avoid reaching a point in life where you realize you’ve been pursuing the wrong goals. Pursuing a goal is important, but the way we accomplish it matters.

Purity vs. Pragmatism in Decision-Making

A CEO’s approach led to transactional relationships and a lack of meaningful connections. The cost of achieving a goal in a certain way can be more expensive in retrospect. Justifying actions and stepping on others to get ahead can damage relationships permanently. Win-win relationships are the only ones that survive over time. Negatively impacting someone can lead to them seeking an alternative, building up resentment over time. The paradox of life is wanting to be admired and respected but thinking success requires the opposite behavior. Virtue is not just a possession but a practice; doing the opposite of what we aspire to be makes it hard to become that person. Character is defined by what you do, not what you are. People rationalize their actions and slowly change as they progress in their careers. Society is surprised by the outcomes of individuals who have worked within a system for a long time. Working within a system or society remakes individuals in its image. Changing character is not as simple as wanting to be a good person; it requires navigating difficult situations and teaching others. It’s easier to see in others that their character won’t change, but it would be sad to realize the same about ourselves. It’s important to accept others for who they are while also not giving up on your ability to change. The decisions you make in your 20s may not align with your values and virtues later in life. James Clear emphasizes the need for a conscious identity shift to make decisions that reinforce that identity. Building the muscle of making individual decisions is crucial for being able to make hard right decisions in the future. Many leaders struggle to make difficult decisions because they haven’t built the strength to do so over time. People may not be able to handle the pain of taking a stand, which could result in backlash or losing their job. There is a need for emotional strength to withstand the consequences of taking a stand on important issues. Small cowardly decisions can lead to the inability to prioritize doing the right thing over keeping a job. Having physical courage doesn’t always translate to having moral courage, and values should guide decision-making. Politicians may get caught up in the news cycle and make decisions based on avoiding giving the other side what they want. Idealists and purists may struggle to accomplish anything, so pragmatism is essential in politics. Jimmy Carter’s pragmatic approach to politics, such as addressing racial discrimination in his inauguration speech, led to his success. President Jimmy Carter’s decision to offer a blanket pardon for anyone who evaded serving in Vietnam on his first day in office is seen as a key factor that may have hindered his chances for a second term. Carter’s approach to governance was characterized by a sense of purity and moral conviction, which may have limited his ability to compromise and collaborate effectively. The discussion explores the distinction between pragmatism, moral purity, and the concept of the ends justifying the means in politics. The Stoics were inherently political, with figures like Seneca and Cato holding public offices and advocating for Stoic involvement in politics. The case of Cato, known for his moral purity and conservatism, illustrates the potential pitfalls of inflexibility in politics, as seen in his inability to compromise with Caesar. Cato’s unwavering commitment to his principles inadvertently drove potential allies into the arms of his opponents, highlighting the complexities of balancing purity and pragmatism in politics. Cicero and Seneca discuss the pragmatic approach to living in reality and making the most of a situation. Seneca’s decision to tutor Nero, a promising but increasingly tyrannical leader, raises questions about complicity and the justification of means. The concept of gradual involvement and investment leading to ethical compromise is explored. The temptation to maintain one’s position and influence, and the self-deception of comparing oneself to others, are highlighted. The importance of taking a stand and being willing to act despite lack of recognition or understanding from others is emphasized. People often make snap judgments based on a specific lens they have, without understanding the nuances of a situation. It’s difficult to make someone understand something when their salary or identity depends on them not understanding. Triggering someone’s identity can lead to a strong resistance to change, as it threatens how they see themselves and want others to see them. It’s challenging to get someone to accept a truth that would make them feel complicit or wrong, as it requires a significant shift in their reality. Understanding someone’s point of view and the variables that matter to them can lead to a more effective approach in trying to change their mindset. Socrates’s idea that nobody is wrong on purpose highlights the importance of stepping into someone else’s perspective before making judgments.

Other Notable Points

The episode also touches on various other topics, such as invention, the Socratic method, and the importance of leaving reviews for the podcast. Listeners are encouraged to rate and review the podcast on iTunes. Prime members can access “The Daily Stoic” early and ad-free on Amazon Music or with Wonder Plus in Apple Podcasts.

Conclusion

This episode of “The Daily Stoic” podcast with Shane Parrish explores the writing process, decision-making, and the importance of clarity and character in pursuing goals. Shane’s insights and experiences provide valuable lessons for writers, decision-makers, and individuals seeking personal growth. The discussion also delves into the complexities of purity versus pragmatism in various contexts, including politics. Overall, the episode offers thought-provoking ideas and practical advice for navigating life’s challenges and making better decisions.